A week, or so

Not too long away was my 20th birthday. Okay to be exactly its 10days ago.



So, haven really done a thank-you-post for those who made it alot better this year. Here I go, special thanks goes to....



Elisa, Jwei and Teckliang! Honestly, thankyou for the present n__n also for the meal, and most important for the time spent and finally we had one of the longest photo spamming in such a long while! Another phase of our lives just passed, and we are growing old. Hahah, but lets just have more fun times together! :)



Sherraine and Brenda! Had a simple dinner, and fun times? Don't think Sherraine (or Brenda) you'll see this, but it was a simple but heart-warming dinner. Prettty girls for birthday dinner? Hahah. Anyway, thanks yeappp. Looking back, its really shows the effort we try to keep in touch with you okay Sherraine! So lets hope let will get better for us :)



Deanna, Nava, Keith, Yiyun, Mich, Stef, Melodi, Brenda, Rachel, Jean and SL! Thank you so much for the celebrations over @ Botanic Gardens. Really had a fun (and stormy) day.Too much to say, but I'll just keep this short Poly days are over, really over. Looking back, there's just too many precious moments over the span of 3years. Time flies. Looking back, we started with only small groups (in our own classes). Was thinking to myself, about how all of us became together as a big bunch.. Rachel and I were the bridge? (Sorta?) And thats how things began.. From now on, we may lead our own lives (yes with guys going to NS blah) and everyone else heading to different Unis (local or not), I just hope we will still have a fun times together, and to make the effort to keep in touch even after we officially graduate.



Of course not forgetting, friends who still bothered to wish me happy birthday via Facebook, text, Twitter and anyone else that I did not mention! Really appreciate it alot.. To me, birthdays means alot when someone actually remembers it (regardless of getting a present from this person or not) and takes the effort to really wish you happy birthday. It upsets me most when people who are closer to me don't actually make that effort? In all honestly, presents are the like last thing according to how I rank birthdays. Believe or not, up to you!



So once again, really thank everyone who made things alot more better, and special for me.



In regards to whatever that happen over that 4days. Before my birthday, during and after. Sigh, its all still in a mess. I still can't really comprehend what went on? There's just too many things that happened and these things are things that meant alot to me. Each one dealt a blow, and the subsequent ones dealt greater blows one after another. It really sucks, and on a deeper level, it just crushed that glimpse of hope that took lots of time to build up.



Not gonna lie but I am still feeling upset over what has happened. Still feeling bitter that EVERYONE had their "best semester results ever in their poly lives" and also "pass with commendation for internships" and whatever not (by this I don't mean that I'm blaming them, rather I'm thinking to myself why do I suck so badly sigh). Still can't understand why of all days to lose my phone, I lost it on the midnight after my birthday @ 2 fucking AM. Got to know that my grandmother over at my biological father's side was hospitalized on my birthday (but thankfully she's feeling alot better and resting at home now). Quarreled with my mother (credits goes to the kids) and almost nearly scream at her and blast at her all at one go.



Well, but what to do? Life sucks, and my life sucks even worse. Haha. Don't understand why do I always give myself false hope thinking life will get better somehow, someday. Always thinking people will appreciate me, and that being helpful, going the extra mile for the others is worth it. Why am I so gullible?



Sigh. Anyway, nevertheless I am ALWAYS grateful for anyone that helps me and that I really appreciate for the effort.



So.....I was suppose to sleep an hour half ago but here I am still blogging here. Guess I should head to bed. Work for the next 3day for an event @ MBS! Hope there's good food, smooth-sailing job and of course the money that comes in after all the hard work!



Goodnight. Also really hope my eyes can heal somehow. Need a miracle to happen ): please stop giving me anymore pain than I already have.



Okaay, for real. Goodnight.