All that I've slogged for
Alright people, it's already the last week of holidays and my homework not even done yet. I could have been enjoying now rather than spastically complaining now.
Maybe I was never cut for BIG things and successful things in life. I take step back and put myself in a third party's point of view and look back what I've done so far, in all my 4years and even back into primary school.
In my primary school, I was never the type who did all great in studies or character. I wasn't someone who would aim to excel so much in life and was probably aimless in life. Had nothing I wanted to be, no one to look up to, nothing of such moral values was deem as essentials in life. Friends were everything to me.
I was rubbish, you could say that.
I did only fairly average in my PSLE scores. I didn't shine nor did well in any subjects. Everything was the same grades except for my mother tongue which is over for me now. I never felt bad, nor was it disappointing scoring grades like that. It wasn't too bad, or was it very proud. However, I know I did my best.
Came to a typical neighbourhood school- Yuying Secondary School. I was never fond of this school, I even felt that this was a Chinese school. I dread this school and wanted to hang out with my friends back in the Tampines region. Where all the people I knew and loved to hang out with were.
Sec 1 was all so typical, I saw people who were worse then me, I saw the better side of me. I started to know what was important to me. What was more and things that I needed to mould a better me.
I came to realize what I could have done, so much more better then in primary school. I took upon this chance, and strive to be a prefect. Which I never could have a chance to back in primary school, other than serving in the school's AVA service, I never had any other chances. I was keen and so eager to show and make myself better.
Through the board, in my first year, I knew so many more things, I made all the friends and everything was all new to me. I never knew any single on of them, I feel so left out and no one could understand how I felt. Everyone was shocked and seem to be astonished when they knew I was from a school that seem faraway island to them- East View Primary School.
Yet, I'm still proud and honoured I'm a student from East View Primary School.
I was all alone but I managed to over the barrier of restriction. I made friends, I was headed for a new life, different from what I had. I knew that things would be different and I wanted to give myself a better future.
I didn't want to end up like primary school, only ended up being called as 'sisi, gay, ah gua, ba bok, wimp, girly and whatever insults that dealt a heavy blow to me'.
I had no protection over all these. I was always unable to protect myself.
Things were way much better, and looking in a different aspect of life, my life was in a total mess. I had no one to talk to, I had difficulties finding people whom I can talk to about these issues related to family. Back in primary school, they were people whom I can, but no longer.
As time passes by, I no longer felt that way, I could speak up and also I found friends that were all fun and great. Awesome they might be, they knew what was right and what was wrong.
Problems started to stand in my way, things were starting to evolve. It was way much different and secondary school was all by your own. You either find foes or friends. It's just that thin line. One moment you could be best of friends, but the next you could lose them anytime.
I didn't know what to do, like what happened to me when I was primary 6, something struck me and I was all lost, I never had the confidence to stand up, not ever again.
I learnt so much in my class, people I met, teachers we've gained so much from. Gossips we've shouted across the whole alley of students. Quarrels that ended up in injuries. Pictures that brings back memories. A bond that could never be bought nor broken. Time that will never be reversable.
Back onto track, years passes by and we were all splited into different classes. I missed them all, even up to this very moment.
Sec 3 was a crucial year for us, being a typical prefect in my two years, I had many goals and also all the different and many many things I wanted to do. To bring the board to greater heights. I aimed so much and it was all down to this very important year.
I done my best, did what I can, I was finally able to be able to something for the school. Compare back in primary school, I didn't gain as much as now because I didn't aim back in primary school. Now that I know what I wanted, I could do so much more and ultimately be a better person in life!!
The board was all great to me. It just makes me tear looking and thinking back all the great moments together, all as one. Camps we've crapped through. Ties we've tied for so many donkey times. Uniform we've maintained and socks were all super high. Hair we dread cuting. Collar pins and tie clip that came all along as well. Talks and workshop seminars we've slept and survived through. Ushering events we've cam-whore for. Orientation that we've went through and became voiceless or speechless. Scoldings we all cried and teared for, and joy and bond we will never forget.
The board has brough so much to me, and more importantly, secondary school was all to me. It made me who I am today and achieved.
Headprefect I became back in mid-term last year. I gained what I've slogged for and there was so many things I could do, finally at last. However, the journey was never easy. There were so many things that just brought me down and made me feel life was all about putting effort and getting reward in return.
However, with no elaboration of what happened in between, things changed. For a 360 degrees.
Now, I've become so much different, a better person in life. So high above and gained so much of what other students has. Compare me and all the others, I was literally priceless now, because of so much that I've gotten from the school and friends, teachers and fellow schoolmates.
However, my family thought differently, to them, I was never able to do something big. Also with no wish to explain, they never ever seem to think I was good for something. I was just like what I was in primary school, to a larger extent, even worse then before.
Maybe it's time to stop and put a stop to this. I guess tomorrow is invest rehearsal and homework are not done yet. Sigh, I guess this is enough for today.
take care, smile more and always.
Tata.
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